Holistic Mommy

So a girl walks into a bar, and... It's open mic comedy night. She has one of the 25 spots, and... Only three of the comics are female. 23 male comics talk about their penises, and... They're gross. These aren't her people, and... She contemplates that it's four hours to better comedy clubs. Not sure she wants to invest that much into healthier venues, so... Through anger and cognitive dissonance she stays. The worst she can do is a little bit better than the trash on stage tonight, and... Tells herself,  'I'll do my bit, then leave' Like Beyonce, she'll mingle with no one, but... The organizer forgot to add her to the list. 'Bullshit' , she thinks, and... Spirals into more anger and cognitive dissonance. They're so bad that she wonders why she is here, so... She decides to leave. She plans her exit, and... Wonders should she do it tactfully or just turn and go. There is no where else to do comedy, and... Her anger grows more. It is 4 hour...

A friend had a good idea not too long ago. "You should do face painting at the kangaroo farm! My friend did it one year and made a ton of money!" I happened to be receptive to this at the time. I have actually gone through great lengths to learn about face painting in the past. In fact, I still have a sealed box of Snazzaroo face paint sitting at home waiting for it's moment to be opened.  I contacted the kangaroo farm... "Sorry, we have a face painter with us this year... Best of luck in your endeavours!" I let it go -- but remained open to any opportunities. Now, one month later an opportunity has risen! Face painting this weekend (that is FOUR days from now) and again on the First of June. That is, like, a week and a bit from now! I turned to Fairy Fox Designs on YouTube and got insight into what to put in my kit:   This is quite a list. Now, I know I don't have to have everything at once but I will give a good effort to put together an 'above and bey...

We have just gone two weeks of spring break (yes, spring break around here is two weeks long) and we did it! Exactly what I had envisioned: low tech and sticking to a normal weekly budget. The first week she was with her Dad. I spent every single day outdoors, ski instructing. The second week she was with mama. It was laid back and wholesome to the point that it is a stretch for me to pull out actual memories or stories of what we did. To prepare, I stocked up on good spring break food (thanks to the clearance shelf at our local health food store), we went over the things she wanted to do for spring break beforehand and then, I wrote her ideas down . Writing her big ideas and aspirations is important in keeping her focused and on track with her hopes and dreams (of course I don't tell her I am doing this). This is one of many parenting techniques I've adapted to get her through the tech era (which is quite intentionally sucking the living daylights out of our future work forc...

When I was a kid, I swam competitively. When I was a teen, I coached four swim teams and taught swimming lessons. When I was a mom with a toddler, I joined a Master's swim team (not just any swim team -- it was hardcore) and piano lessons (these weren't just any piano lessons -- they were hardcore.). When my daughter was a preschooler, I registered for an open water swim, placed first in my age category -- and then stopped swimming for seven years. (It was way too hard to manage practices, money, and the copious amounts of BS in my life). When my kiddo was a tween, I decided, 'heck, my life still sucks but I'm having some fun. I'm going to do the open water swim again'. So seven years later, I found myself back in the water getting ready for an open water swim. But... Something in my workouts was off and I couldn't quite place it. Then, months in, I experienced something similar to an asthma attack while racing Horse Girl to the bus stop. Years of...