Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Sneaky, Sneaky

How did my jar of olives make it to the front door? Did somebody drop off a jar of olives for me because there is a jar of olives sitting on the table just inside the doorway.

No, of course not; that was my toddler's doing. Any parents of toddlers know that it is impossible to open the refrigerator door without a toddler coming out of nowhere, shoving in front of you as though they're fighting for front row at a concert, and grabbing everything they can with their chubby little hands. In all the time it takes you to retrieve the one item you were looking for, remove little person (and chubby hand), and successfully shut the door, they've already snuck off with your jar of olives.

When objects do go missing from around the house (such as food from the refrigerator), I always check the play kitchen first. Those cupboard doors are so fun to open and shut, open and shut. Not only that, but cupboards are meant to store things -- teddy bears, half empty cups of milk, shoes.

If said missing object is not there, I go peak in the blender. Yes, the blender. It's kept in a cupboard that's low to the ground; I've found apples, wooden blocks, plastic cutlery and toys in there. If A.'s shoes have gone missing (the little boy I take care of during the day) I always check Stinker's feet. She's loves his shoes. They don't have blinky lights, they don't squeak and they don't have cartoon characters on them. They are fun to put on because they're the newest member on the shoe rack. If I'm missing anything remotely important such as my car keys, cell phone or Safeway Club Card, I'll check between the couch cushions or under the bed mattress. I've watched her as she has slid various items under the cushions. Very scrupulously, she pushes them just far enough back so as to make sure they don't poke out. She'll get down to eye level and check to make sure the item is not visible. When she's satisfied with the precision of her work, she'll jump up, spin around and get right back to playing as if she hadn't just caused a future, frantic, "where's, my bank card!?" crazy Mommy session.

And if her toothbrush goes missing? I just buy a new one. Where do the toothbrushes go anyway? We've been through four...

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