Mortgage? Meh. Renting? Meh.

Mortgages, hey? I dunno. I let go of home ownership when Little One was young. A home at that time was over $800,000. I couldn't even cover groceries let alone build savings. We got through it though and over the years, I stayed true to my value of providing for her a magical childhood filled with incredible memories. Now she is older... I get to revisit home ownership.

I am currently petsitting on a farm in my hometown (population 1500) for the next three weeks. Where I am situated there is food storage, cold food storage, greenhouses, a giant garden, fruit trees, lush marijuana plants, a well-stocked pantry, pets and three months of food stored...

Wandering out of the land of impossibility and back into our rural mountain town, possibility returns. Living in a metropolitan area for the past 15 years, I witnessed so many humans putting all their life energy into mortgages. The level of joy and quality of life in those locations is underwhelming.

Renting for life has been an incredible disappointment -- and something I have let go of. The issues with renting are more to do with the toxic landlords, theft of security deposits, the quickly changing neighbourhood dynamics and the reality that numerous home owners don't actually want 'long term tenants'. (Fresh new tenancy agreements with increased rental rates every few years are ideal to keep up with whatever issues they have going on with their mortgage rates.) We have moved, on average, every three to three and a half years due to reasons beyond our control.

There is still a strongly held mainstream belief that all Canadians should own a home. I believed that once -- and it was common in my euro-centric upbringing to have that dream come to fruition. What I have realized this week is that home ownership, like everything for me, comes down to value.

I value myself enough to say that I am willing to offer no more than $400,000 toward a mortgage. Depending on where I purchase, this could provide me with a large property to live sustainably and have a goat. Or it could provide me a 800sq ft condo in a newly gentrified area. Where would I keep the goat? Regardless, home ownership wouldn't give back and I would have to let go of a lot -- my community, my place in this world, our mountains, oceans.

I spoke to the banker -- I said, "many young people are not purchasing mortgages because they are beyond reach". I shared my ideas of where else I could invest money and asked is this something that people are doing. She excitedly said, "yes, one hundred percent people are doing that!" ...And proceeded to share options for financially securing my future -- and in ways that (mostly) aligned with my values.

I won't give any more of myself to a system that doesn't give back. Public school was depleting enough for my spirit -- for many of our spirits. There are so many ways to live. I won't give up who I am to relocate for a house nor will I 'start small' and shack up in a condo. 

Neither standard renting nor traditional mortgages are the way for us. I have all my trust in Creator and look forward to the unfolding...